Christmas Exchange and Other Christmasy Tales
by jack63kids
Summary: Short drabbles on Christmas themes, including Dr W's relationship with a young client of Sherlock's. Stands on own, but better to read background in other stories ... no slash, no adult content. Added chapter for JAL who likes this kind of thing.
1. Christmas Shopping

It's great to have money again. Means I can go out and buy a proper shop without any disagreements with chip and pin machines. Glorious.

Ok, so I'd rather overdone it that day, but it was too tempting to buy all those Christmas goodies along with enough food for us, and a dozen of our closest friends, to survive a lengthy siege. I'd not really considered the unbelievable amount of doors and stairs that you need to access our rooms.

I had struggled with my key and passed the first obstacle and was now maneuvering what seemed like a twenty plastics bags filled to bursting with the spoils of my trip up the stairs. How had they ever got so long! Sherlock charged up the stairs, pushing past me and the twenty bags to get to the door first. At least that was one I'd not have to bother with.

"Thanks, Sher -" I got as far as saying as the door banged closed behind him with the finality of a gravestone.

I let my loads drop to the floor as I searched pockets for my missing keys, only to find them still in the front door downstairs, luckily still there and not in the pocket of a chancer who'd be up to no good next time we went out. I got back to the top of stairs, a weary man and when I got through the door it did nothing to improve my deteriorating mood to see Sherlock sprawled over his favourite chair with his legs up and eyes half closed.

"You could have held the door open!" I suggested.

"You've got a key - why would I get up out of my chair to go open a door when you can do it perfectly well yourself," he retorted, sounding for all the world as if I'd insulted his mother.

"You were on the stairs when I was coming in, just a moment ago," I pointed out reasonably.

"No," he countered, "I wasn't. Haven't been out all day in fact."

Ok, I'm no consultant detective, but there was pretty conclusive evidence not counting a reliable eye witness account and a certain lack of an impeachable alibi. "So, you got the damp on your turn-ups from watching TV and those traces of grass on the souls of your shoes from boiling the kettle?"

Sherlock down at his ankles as if they had let him down in a terrible and demeaning way.

"And then there's the fact that you are still wearing your outdoor shoes ... and your coat and scarf ..." I continued.

Sherlock yawned like a cat might who's been caught red handed stealing fish from the table in front of a number of diners and is still intent on denying it.

"Oh, that," he said lethargically. "Urgent call by Lestrade. "You were there!" Sherlock looked slightly confused. "Weren't you?"

"No," I said helpfully, "I was out buying your dinner and you didn't tell me there was a case on."

"So, who was that who was assisting me with the investigation?" Sherlock was talking to himself now rather than me. "Wasn't Anderson, not as annoyingly stupid. What she said about the smudges on the curtains was certainly above average-"

"She?" I promoted.

"She - what?" Sherlock asked, looking superior.

"You said, 'she'."

"Did I? So I did. Not-Molly, not-Donovan ... What other females do we know? What other females do we not know?" He looked up expectantly to get my response, which at that point was me groaning and rubbing my hands distractedly through my hair.

"Sherlock, if you want a list then you'll have to narrow it down from women we know, plus women we don't know. Is she a doctor?"

"Has a doctorate, but not a medical doctor."

"Does she work for the police?"

"Yes."

"What capacity?"

"None."

"Then what does she do for the police?"

"Nothing."

"Sherlock, this is going to take a very long time if you're going to be deliberately obtuse. You just said said she works for the police and now you say not."

"_You_ said she worked for the police I confirmed that she _did_ ...", Sherlock looked up at John's irritated face, " ... today, she worked for the police today and rather adequately I might add." Praise indeed for Sherlock.

"Was it 'her'?" I asked, not really wanting to know the answer.

"Your 'her' or my 'her'?" he asked, with a little too much insight I thought, but surprisingly amount of self-realisation.

"Mine," I said bitterly, adding _not-mine_ in my head.

"Sounds rather like 'your her'; let's say it _was_ shall we," he said blithely, kicking off his shoes at the heels.


	2. Christmas Presents

**CHRISTMAS**

That Christmas I was worried about a repeat performance of how Sherlock had humiliated our good friend Molly one year and chased away yet another one of my girlfriends. He could manage two birds with one stone with her and she was planning to call over to deliver presents on Christmas Eve. She'd limited us to presents of no significant value - preferably something made ourselves - though she directed this one at me - Sherlock being more likely to give something impersonal - with more meaning to him than the person he was giving to.

She arrived looking stunning and with three beautifully wrapped presents - apparently she knows Mrs Hudson much better than I realised. She's the only person I've ever heard call her by her first name and I wondered to whom she was referring.

Quick flashback to the Molly incident there, but Sherlock was on best behaviour - kissed our guest on the mouth when she arrived - I got a cheek kiss. Never sure what to make of that.

Sherlock was less lenient over the present. He looked wryly uncomfortable looking at the parcel and said "I don't wear ties." like a school boy being given an encyclopedia for Christmas when he wanted a bike - though I've no doubt that Sherlock would never have been thrilled with a bike.

She was completely un-phased and said simply: "Now what's the logic in having a good tie-pin and no tie, Sherlock?" And he meekly opened the parcel and allowed her to put the tie on for him. An action that caused me as much pain as hilarity.

Sherlock surprised us all by giving her a tiny Chinese silk painting in a silver frame. It was simple and beautiful and she was stunned into silence as she held it - gazing for some time with a look of wonder on her face. I've never known him buy anything personal for anyone before - obviously I buy for Molly and Mrs Hudson and we have a pact that he'll never buy anything for me whatever the occasion, not that he remembers birthdays ...

And then she slipped it into her pocket, quickly kissed Sherlock again - agony! And then handed me a parcel that also looked like a picture frame, but much larger than one that Sherlock had given to her. And was as it turned out - or at least a photo in a simple, wooden frame. It wasn't black and white, but the colours were so subtle that it had the feel of black and white stills I'd seen in galleries. The figure is not central nor dominates the picture, but recognisably me, taken on the beach that day - a present that I shall always treasure. I was not quite in silhouette against a turbulent sky, being just able to make out a pensive expression on my face. I'm wearing those jeans she still likes and her spare biker's jacket, unzipped and with my hands in the pockets. I'm looking out to sea. It is still the best picture I have of me, though she's taken a few more that I can bear to look at since. Sherlock insisted on hanging it immediately, to my slight embarrassment.

I was a little ashamed of the little carving of a sand piper that I'd whittled from the driftwood I'd picked up during our date and used a chip of stone from a pebble for the eye - she realised that immediately and was obviously touched. I was rewarded with a lengthy hug - just over the socially acceptable three second limited - though no on the mouth kiss as Sherlock's present had inspired. I still don't know what I'm doing wrong there


	3. Having People Round

"We _never_ have anyone round." I was exasperated with Sherlock's hermit life while dragging me into forced bachelorhood.

"When we're _in_ - it's Piccadilly Circus when we're _not_."

This was disturbing news, he'd never said anything before. "What do you mean? _Who?_"

Sherlock got up from the sofa - minor miracle! - and went to the window where he sniffed the curtains - "CIA," he pronounced.

He crouched down picking at something on the carpet and opened the door to look at a small smudge on the outside. "Mycroft's agents, too lazy to come himself."

Sherlock ran a hand down the books in a high up shelf and pulled one out, feeling carefully with long fingers behind it. "Mycroft again."

He walked over to the sofa, picking up a cushion and peering closely. "That girl of yours."

"Which one? The boring teacher or the one with the dog - or was that the same person? It's been so long, Sherlock, since you've scared them all off, I can hardly remember."

"Current one", he said distractedly.

"What do you mean? ... _Oh!_ ... but she comes here all the time to work on cases."

"... when we're _not_ here", Sherlock replied mysteriously. "So you see we do have people round."

" Not what I meant, Sherlock. It's just a little New Years Eve party. Auld Lang Syne and all that bosh."


	4. Driving Holmes at Christmas

_**Driving Holmes at Christmas**_  
>I'm driving Holmes at Christmas<br>Oh, I can't wait to end this mission  
>I'm driving Holmes at Christmas, yeah<p>

Well, I'm sitting in the back  
>And it's been so dull<br>But I will be there  
>Tapping my phone ...<br>To pass the time away  
>Driving in his car<br>Driving Holmes at Christmas

It's gonna take some time  
>Fifty rings now<br>Jump to the next level  
>Oh, I got Eggman on the run<br>But soon there'll be a lamppost  
>Sonic's feet on middle ground<p>

Playing Angry Birds ...  
>Though John can't see that<br>Complacent pigs  
>Are all around me<br>I am driving Holmes at Christmas  
>Driving Holmes at Christmas<br>It's my duty - MI5

I take look at the doctor next to me  
>Gave a false name<br>Such a shame

Jump to the last level  
>Oh, I got Eggman on the run<br>I'm driving Holmes at Christmas, yeah  
>Get Sonic to change the sign ...<p>

Playing Angry Birds ...  
>Though John can't see that<br>Complacent pigs  
>Are all around me<br>Driving in his car  
>Driving Holmes at Christmas<br>Driving Holmes at Christmas  
>It's my duty - MI5<p>

* * *

><p><strong>Chris Rea<strong>_** - Driving Home For Christmas**_

_ watch?v=THcbQyFtCqg_


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